This is a speach that I am going to give this afternoon in the speach class.

Do you guys still remember that I've told you that I can't live without music?  So today I am gonna talk about more about that.

If you ask me what kind of music that I like best, I would say it is rock music.  After knowing that I love rock music, many people may feel a little bit surprised, because they don't think girls would like to listen to this kind of music.  They think, oh girl, you should listen to something more peaceful.  However, I just fall in love with rock music.  I like to hear their shouting, their singing out aloud, their playing guitars, drums and basses.  It's really awesome. 

Rock music makes me feel that I am living.  Like John Lennon said, rock is real.  Many rock musicians are really sincere.  They appreciate to put all of their feelings into their songs.  Those songs really strike me.  The lyrics can read my mind.  It since like the composers know what I am thinking about.

Some people may feel that rock is such a kind of noise.  It's so noisy.  As for me, however, sometimes rock music makes me calm.  If my world is filled with these loud music, then I won't here the noise of the outside world.  In my world, it's really silent.

To some extent, rock music is like a kind of drug and I am so addicted to it.  It has been a part of my life and I will never leave it. 

Well, I ...
I am really surprised that you left comment here.  I thought no one would come here.
Thx anyway.

I was about to sleep, but I thought of something so I am gonna write them down here and then I will go to sleep.

Something was gone but I still try to get them back.  I failed.  Obviously I was totally wrong.  Something that was gone will never come back.  No one can get them back.  It was silly to think that me myself can let them back.  How stupid I was.

Maybe it is the fate.  It is God who let things be like that.  I'd better stop the strange ideas.  It is just the fate.

That what I want to say.
It will be an exam on 9 o'clock.  I gotta sleep now.

Finally, I choose blogbus.  The layout here is great.

The farewell party will be on tonight.  We've been preparing for it for almost a month.  Hope that there aint anything wrong with it.

Finally, they graduate.  They have to go, to find jobs, to live their life on their own.  Finally, I wont be a freshmen anymore.  After three years, I will have to go, just like them.  I am still afraid of that.

Mom told me to study hard.  Dont play the tricks.  She said that the good luck wont be in company with me all the time.  I know what she meaned.  But sometimes I was just so lazy.  I was not willing to spend all the time on study.  Even I know that I can absolutely get higher scores if I spend more time doing that. 

How terrible I am.

Finally, what can I be?  I dont know.  I always think that the unknown future is so scaring.  You have no idea about the future.  You dont know what it will gonna be.  Maybe it is a bright future, maybe not.  Can I really get a bright future if I study hard?  Everybody will answer "Yes" but I dont know.

"Cross the bridge when you come to it."  I love this sentence.  I am willing to believe that finally everything will be just fine.  So even if the future makes me scard, I just try to ignore it.  Finally, we will get it through.

I've been long time not writting English and reading English.  For a long time I was confused that whether my study of English was good or not.  I am not good at organizing sentences.  All that I've learned I would forget when I am organizing sentences, the phrases, the words, I just forget.

It's quite horrible.

These days I still keep touch with Kain.  Maybe we really have got used to this relationship.  One day afternoon, I got his sms which said that he felt that something was missing if he didnt get my sms.  That was what I was thinking at that moment.  Iwas amazed that we were just thinking about the same thing.  Now I keep sending him the mms every now and then.  I just want to show him my life.  Sometimes he replied sometimes not.  I was upset for a time but now I feel better.  And I just try not to think it's a big deal.  What he said is right.  It's your own bussiness that you consider a person as your good friend.  Dont care about whether that person would do the same thing or not.  It doesnt matter what that person think of you.

There's no need to think about others.

Now the final exams are around the corner.  I'm really scared that I'll fail.  So many courses I've chosen on this term and I really dont think that they'll all pass.

Time is limited but I am still indulging in the internet and music.  God, help me, please.  Can you just get me out of those stuff?  I just cant do it on my own.

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The passage above was written in the US History class.
Oh my GOD, I always wrote diary when I am having class- -.

Today I'm feeling better, but still feel a little bit tired.  I'm almost late for this class, because I got up late this morning.  I just wanna sleep more.  Today I cant send any shot msgs and I have to recharge my mobile phone.  I got a msg yesterday night from Kain.  He told me that he has got a part-time job now.  I still dont know what the job is. 

I'm late so I cant sit where I always sit.  Teacher asked me why I change the seat and I told him that there was no seat for me there.  I am not used to this new seat as well.  Here I'm alone.  No one I can talk to.

Today I wear the wrong shirt.  It's too small for me.  I feel uncomfortable.

A magazine about constellations prophesied that I would have experienced a series of good things yesterday, but in fact, nothing happened.  I just stayed in my dormitory foe a whole day and play my computer, write an 300-word-paper.  It was boring.  You can never believe that shit.  Am I gonna be more lucky today?  I dont know but I hope so.

It's still rainning now.  I hate this goddamn weather.  It makes me feel upset.  I hate that grey sky.  It maked me feel that everything is fucking messed up.  I hate this feeling.

The seller in TaoBao told me that I have to wait about two more weeks fot the MTM album.  Oh my GOD.  I have to wait another half of a mouth.  What the heck. 

Sometimes I really feel that I am just a little child.  I'm 19 years old now but sometimes I am just like a kid.  The way I dealed with the problems just showed my infantility.

Oh shit.  This fucking small shirt really upset me.  I wanna run away.  I wanna go back to my dormitory.  I dont wanna have the next fucking English Class.

Three girls are playing a small funny game behind me.  I just watched them but didnt join them.  It seemed like I'm not a member in this class.

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This diary was written in my English Writing Class.
I was really feeling bad at that time.  Forgive my language.

It's so hot today.  The air-conditioner is off.  I am so uncomfortable.  I feet that something is conglutinating on my skin.  The air is wet.  The feeling is so bad.

I got a cold and I'm feeling dizzy now.  I'm so sleepy and I just want to sleep in my bed.  I'm so tired that I cant read the book.  Wearing the ear-phone, listening to the music, I dont wanna hear what the teacher was saying.  I hate this VB Course.  It's so boring.  I cant understand why we should have this course.  I dont think it's useful.

I want to quit next calss, but I'm afraid that the teacher would call the roll.  I dont know why but I just have the strong feeling that she would call the roll today.- -# 

Today is Friday.  Kain has been in Beijing for about 6 days.  These days we sent sms to each other.  We chatted a lot.  Sometimes I just dont want him to be so boring so I sent sms to him.  He said that he may come to Shenzhen this summer holidays and he asked me to hang out with him by then.  I said yes to him.  I really want to meet this friend.  Since we knew each other through internet, we've never met each other before.  The photos are not real enough.  Therefor, I expect that this summer holidays would come soon.  And I hope that he would have the chance to come to Shenzhen by then.

Now I'm listening to Minutes To Midnight, which is really an amazing album.  I'm waiting for the CD+DVD.  Hope that I can get them soon.

These days there always are some English sentences running through my head.  I thought almost everyting in English.  Maybe it was because that I want to proove that I can use English well but not just take the exams.  Well, this feeling is pretty good.  Sometimes I just cant help speaking English in my daily life.  It is quite a big progress.  At least I can write down my whole diary in English, though I have to get help from the dictionary.  However, sometimes I prefer to use Chinese to express my inner feelings.  After all, my mother tougue is Chinese and I think Chinese words really have the charm.  Sometimes you can only use those Chinese words to describe some kinds of feelings.

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This diary is written down when I was having the VB Class.

Today morning I got my friend's call.  She didnt say anything but just cried.  She then told me she was so confused.  She said that the future is unknown so she was scared, for something unlucky may probably happened.  "What if I get cancer and die?  What if I cant get a job after graduation?  What if I cant find a boy I love to marry?  What if I am not as good as others in this society?  What if I am so poor that I cant live a life?" she asked me.  

In fact, I dont konw whether all this stuff would gonna happen or not.  I am scared about them as well.  And sometimes we just dont know what the hell we work hard for.  We dont know.  Does it really make sence that if we work hard we will absolutely get a nice future?  We dont know.

However, I cant told my friend all above, coz those would make her even be more sad.  I just told her that it's no big deal and plz just think about today, think about the life today.  Every morning when you get up, if you find that you are still alive and you can enjoy the sunshine, that's enough.  Dont think about the goddamn future.  We can just get through with it at that time.  Dont worry about that.

At last, my friend felt better, but I really get confused.  I asked another friend of mine why we have to work hard now and whether it does work, whether it will lead us to the bright future.  He said, "um...but if we do not work hard now we will absolutely gonna have no future."  He told me that we all just live for the trust, which is to believe something, believe that the bright future do exist, believe that all the tough days we experienced are just for the better future.  I didnt reply him any more, coz I really need to think about it and pursuade myself that it's real.  It's real that we all will gonna have a nice bright future.

Ok, this is my third blog entry here.

I decieded to write my English diary here to practice my English.  These days I found that I really cant use English to express myself clearly.  I always thought of some words complicated but fogot the most simple ones.  I've study English for so many years.  What I've learn should be enough for me to compose the articles but sometimes I just cant do that.  Maybe it's because that I learn English not for life but for  exam.  I can get a good mark in the exam but I cant write down a whole diary of my life and make conversations influently in English.

That's why I decided to write my English diary here.  I give myself a chance to improve my English.  Hope that one day I can use English to express myslef clearly just as using CHINESE.

yep.this is my second blog enrty in myspace.com..

i almost forget what i have written in last blog entry.i dont give a damn.

now i'm in shenzhen university.it's a nice university.i met some funny guys,including a boy who i want to fall in love with.i really dont know what is gonna happen in the future.so i just let it be.

I have to type English.What the hell...

I am not going to write my blog here.I just want to have a try.

I am not used to typing English.I am really sorry...

The day after tomorrow, I will finish my college entrance examination. Almost all the Chinese student have been waiting that day for about 12 years from primary school. I really hate that kind of examination but I have to take that if I want to go to a university.

SO  I am so happy. Everything will be finished.
Eventually I can shout out loudly that I wont learn this shit anymore!